American Writing Week 4

Imagine you are hitching a ride with Huck and Jim. Write a paragraph describing the setting and the atmosphere of what it is like to be with these two runaways.

The boat drifted ever slow down the river. The water lapping gently at the sides, caressing the lip of the makeshift bow, shifting away from and merging with itself in an almost calm fashion. The sun hung low in the sky, painting dark water and the surrounding land in an all-encompassing orange glow. The green foliage growing up from the ground seemed to be brimming with life as the animals and plants made themselves scarce, preparing for the night. The sound of my counterparts bantering between each other grasped my attention, cutting through the blissful stillness of the painted world that I gazed upon, drawing me back to reality.

Jim stood tall in comparison to young Huck as they bickered about nothing and everything at once. It was strange to see two people who lived lives with such a great difference between them interact and coexist in a way that was almost symbiotic, in a way. Jim looked tense, well… not so much tense but prepared. Ready for whatever the world had next to throw at the three of us. Huck lay on the floor of the raft,  staring up into the eyes of Jim. Relaxed he was, completely and utterly, seemingly to carefree to note the uniqueness of our situation and the danger of where we were… he lived in bliss.

I smiled, dipping my feet into the water and laying on my back, shielding my face from the sun, as we traveled further into unknown territory.

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6 thoughts on “American Writing Week 4

  1. Hi, Jackson!

    I really enjoyed how you set the scene here! The descriptive language you used was great! You were able to capture the scene beautifully which allowed me to visualise the setting very well. I also liked how you described Jim and Huck, capturing their relationship. I also, liked how you compared both characters highlighting how their differences can be used to mirror each other positively. The flow in your writing when reading this, allowed me to imagine the atmosphere and I really liked how you referred to your surroundings some what like a painting. I guess life is like a painting, free for you to create whatever you please.

    Great job!

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  2. Hi there Jackson,
    A really interesting blog post this week. I thought the writing style combined with the immersive language created a captivating experience that really drew me in to the story. I also did this topic for this week’s blog, and your entry was both inviting and vibrant and its imagery. I felt that perhaps some direct conversation could have further enhanced the narrative, but your focus on the landscape of the river more than made up for it. Overall, a really great blog. Can’t wait to see more of your blogging in the future!

    – Anthony

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  3. Hi Jackson,

    I thoroughly enjoyed reading this post. The nature imagery and general style certainly resonated Twain’s own writing. I liked your separation of paragraphs, with the first reserved for an individual reflection on the beauty of the natural surrounds, and the second to engage with an interpretation of the characters. Just a very minor tip for editing: “seemingly TOO carefree” (not to).
    Congratulations on a truly impressive blog post.

    Like

  4. Hi Jackson,

    I really like this entry because you’ve effectively explained what your experience might be like if you were to be with Huck and Jim. Your description is quite poetical, and it contains a rhythmic quality to it. This is most evident when you state: “The green foliage growing up from the ground seemed to be brimming with life as the animals and plants made themselves scarce, preparing for the night”. Your entry also builds a lot of visual imagery for the reader, which makes it much more engaging. In order to improve this entry, I would make a few adjustments to this line: “It was strange to see two people who lived lives with such a great difference between them interact and coexist in a way that was almost symbiotic, in a way”. I feel like you’ve made a typo by writing “in a way” twice, and I also think that the words “interact”, “coexist”, and “symbiotic” kind of imply the same thing, so I would choose one or two words to get your point across in a more concise way. Other than that, keep up the great work! 🙂

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  5. Dear Jackson,

    You have written a very creative piece. In the first paragraph specifically I felt as though I was reading an excerpt from the novel itself. You have managed to convey what the experience of a third person on the raft would really be like. Well done!

    Like

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